Divorce is a terrible thing. A marriage should never have to end in divorce. I understand that there are certain circumstances where it is better for a marriage to end, but if these situations can be avoided in any way possible, a couple should do everything they can to keep their marriage strong and alive.
I have witnessed a few divorces in my years; one with my aunt and uncle and one with the parents of several boys that I was a nanny for a few summers ago. It is a sad thing to watch. It is hard to watch what was once a strong bond, deteriorate into a broken relationship with feelings of regret, shame, doubt, sorry, or confusion. Everyone's situation is different, but many situations have the same affects and outcomes. It is hard for someone to just forget their former spouse. You may think that once you break that bond of marriage, you no longer have ties with that person. That is false. Divorce can be a long legal process, you will always have some feelings for your "ex" whether they be good or bad and if children are in the family picture, you will never be able to avoid the father or mother of your children (that's if both parents want to be involved in their children's lives).
There are many costs of divorce.
There are 6 stages of divorce.
Divorce is just messy. I can't even think about what I want to talk about because it is so exhausting. I can't begin to imagine what it would be like to actually be going through a divorce, nor do I want to.
There soon comes a time to move on and find a new spouse or family to belong to. Then there comes the issues of adjusting to a new environment with new people, living through another divorce with fear, compensating, and blending. If all goes well, one can learn from their possible mistakes, find someone to spend your life with and feel like they belong. We want to belong and feel loved and we will do whatever we can to find obtain that.
I have witnessed a few divorces in my years; one with my aunt and uncle and one with the parents of several boys that I was a nanny for a few summers ago. It is a sad thing to watch. It is hard to watch what was once a strong bond, deteriorate into a broken relationship with feelings of regret, shame, doubt, sorry, or confusion. Everyone's situation is different, but many situations have the same affects and outcomes. It is hard for someone to just forget their former spouse. You may think that once you break that bond of marriage, you no longer have ties with that person. That is false. Divorce can be a long legal process, you will always have some feelings for your "ex" whether they be good or bad and if children are in the family picture, you will never be able to avoid the father or mother of your children (that's if both parents want to be involved in their children's lives).
There are many costs of divorce.
- Divorce is costly; it is expensive to terminate a marriage and it is a long and tedious process
- Divorce affects everyone, not just the couple. It affects the children within the family as well as relatives and friends. People may have to choose sides
- You can never really get away from each other (unless you move to a different country)
- Divorce takes a toll on self-esteem and self-worth
- Many couples regret splitting up after 2 years
- There are feelings of loss
- It may cause some trouble for future relationships
There are 6 stages of divorce.
- emotional- loss of trust and respect, commitment, and concern
- legal- going through the actual divorce process
- economic- division of assets and belongings
- co-parental- dividing up care and responsibility and deciding who will have custody
- community- leaves friendship to find new ones
- psychic
Divorce is just messy. I can't even think about what I want to talk about because it is so exhausting. I can't begin to imagine what it would be like to actually be going through a divorce, nor do I want to.
There soon comes a time to move on and find a new spouse or family to belong to. Then there comes the issues of adjusting to a new environment with new people, living through another divorce with fear, compensating, and blending. If all goes well, one can learn from their possible mistakes, find someone to spend your life with and feel like they belong. We want to belong and feel loved and we will do whatever we can to find obtain that.