Oh Dating. I think this topic is the most confusing this on the planet. The thing is, it didn't used to be so complicated!! Where are the boundaries? What are these different label? Everything about dating seems so complicated in our world today that it seems people are giving up. And that is sad. We are going to see a lot of sad single pringles.
My Dad came up to me one day, asking about "the boys" and I said oh yeah, me and blah blah blah are dating. Then he asked what that meant. I told him that we are boyfriend and girlfriend. He was a little confused. He thought dating meant going on dates with several different people and not just being exclusive with one person. After that, we both just got confused and I told him times have changed.....He nodded his head in agreement.
What has happened to dating and going through the steps? Now dating is just so casual and has turned into hanging out, hooking up, and the dates not really meaning anything. The real purpose of dating is getting to know different people and finding out want you want/don't want in a relationship. If you do not learn something from a relationship whether it lasted or not, then it was wasted.
What are the steps of dating?
Today (so it seems to me...not how I view my dating...but how I see it in teens today...so on and so on.....)
That just made everything super depressing. First of all, you should not date someone exclusively until you have dated around, you know what you want in a relationship, and you do more than just kiss and chill. Dating used to mean something. Dating was fun! (so I've heard from my father). My dad went on many dates and he never really had girlfriends. He just remembered having a lot of close friends that he would go out with and the cool thing was, nobody got jealous because everyone dated around! Today, if you see a guy going out with another girl you assume they are an item and that he is off limits or you hate that girl for going out with "your man". Everything is so complicated. I wish dating could go back to how it used to be. I wasn't even around at this time, but I want to go back to when you knew what you were with someone and true feelings weren't a secret. Remember communication!
How dating used to be/should be
My Dad came up to me one day, asking about "the boys" and I said oh yeah, me and blah blah blah are dating. Then he asked what that meant. I told him that we are boyfriend and girlfriend. He was a little confused. He thought dating meant going on dates with several different people and not just being exclusive with one person. After that, we both just got confused and I told him times have changed.....He nodded his head in agreement.
What has happened to dating and going through the steps? Now dating is just so casual and has turned into hanging out, hooking up, and the dates not really meaning anything. The real purpose of dating is getting to know different people and finding out want you want/don't want in a relationship. If you do not learn something from a relationship whether it lasted or not, then it was wasted.
What are the steps of dating?
Today (so it seems to me...not how I view my dating...but how I see it in teens today...so on and so on.....)
- Oh look a cute guy
- CRUSH
- MUTUAL CRUSH
- Boy: "Hey want to go out?" (not even go out physically, going out on a date, go out meaning "Be my girlfriend?")
- Girl: "Sure"
- Date for a few weeks, convinced he is the one, say "I love you" without knowing what it really means
- Call each other your "Bae", "Boo Thang", "Babe" whatever
- Hang out/hook up (casual things)
- Breakup because someone cheated or just being bored
- Give up on dating
That just made everything super depressing. First of all, you should not date someone exclusively until you have dated around, you know what you want in a relationship, and you do more than just kiss and chill. Dating used to mean something. Dating was fun! (so I've heard from my father). My dad went on many dates and he never really had girlfriends. He just remembered having a lot of close friends that he would go out with and the cool thing was, nobody got jealous because everyone dated around! Today, if you see a guy going out with another girl you assume they are an item and that he is off limits or you hate that girl for going out with "your man". Everything is so complicated. I wish dating could go back to how it used to be. I wasn't even around at this time, but I want to go back to when you knew what you were with someone and true feelings weren't a secret. Remember communication!
How dating used to be/should be
- Go out with friends
- Go on many different dates with different people
- You find someone you are interested in
- Go on more dates with that one person
- Discuss hopes and intentions (DTR)
- Spend time with that person, exchange feelings
- Time Passes
- Courtship and dating (boyfriends used to ask the girlfriend's father if he could DATE her!)
- Time Passes
- Engagement (he asks her father for her hand)
- Marriage